Thursday, July 21, 2011

Gonna end up getting dragged out kicking and screaming.

So yeah. That last post was an angry one. I'm over it. I got everything finished up that I wanted to get finished up, got it all as organized as I could, and I've let it go. Walked away! That was a nice feeling, although I still sometimes want to just check in and see how it's all holding together, because I'm worried that it's not, and that things are getting missed, and it would be really nice to get my ROE so I can claim EI, but STOP! I need to focus on more important things! We're here at the IWK hospital, we've been here for a full 10 days, and they're taking pretty good care of me, and I don't have to worry about going into false labor and rushing into the hospital and having them tell me it's false and to go home. I'm already here, they can't kick me out! Ha! Really, there haven't been any changes at all. Well, other than the plan.

The Plan:

Original plan: scheduled c-section, Friday July 22nd, followed by babies surgery, and recovery.

Plan two: Who needs a c-section? Not you if you don't want it! Ok, we'll just induce you instead on the 22nd, and if everything goes ok, you can have him naturally, and depending on your platelets, maybe you'll even have the options of pain meds!

Plan three: Oh yeah, everyone goes home on the weekends, that means we'd have to call someone in on a Saturday or Sunday if you don't deliver right away, and so-and-so is on vacation, that's right! Ok, lets move induction to Sunday, then hopefully you'll deliver on Monday or something like that. Remember: Every day the baby bakes in there is a bonus!

Plan four: Hmm, your blood pressure has crept up to the low range of the high category, lets look into reasons for that, if such-and-such are showing up in your results, we'll induce sooner, and that'll take away the extra risks. So maybe sooner rather than later!

Plan five: Nah, maybe we're not so concerned. We'll switch to using a different piece of equipment that gives a lower bp reading, and just keep an eye on it. And bed rest for you. That'll keep your pressure down. Sunday it is!

I'm totally commiserating with largely pregnant women who have the advantage of medical services across the world. I know why they often get the rep of being "crazy pregnant woman". It's because they're driven crazy by the people surrounding them. They can tell enough to monitor every little flux, catch every little flutter, and therefore take every little precaution. I'm grateful for it all, I really am, but man, no wonder blood pressure goes up!!! Far too many things to now worry about. I'm very happy that my risk of dying in childbirth is significantly decreased from like the 1800's, it just seems a bit needlessly stressful.

I'll be honest, this isn't a ride I've enjoyed. Some women do, others don't, I guess I'll fall squarely in the latter category. It's not been comfortable, it's been stressful, there was the whole risk of spontaneous unstoppable bleeding,  I don't think my pelvis will ever stop aching, I miss my husband and my animals terribly and I'm wondering if my feet will ever look like my feet again. But he's worth it. Of course he is. So will that beer be I'm going to have when I get back home*. You know, in between feedings.

*(Yes, I fully feel that the baby is better than beer. But I've had beer before, and it's quite nice. I've never had a baby.)

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